The past 2 days, I've had some really great conversations and a lot of thinking on my part. 

It's a new year.

It's the first full year I am married.

I am away from all I've ever really known.

I'm starting a completely different and new life.

I'm dealing with new and very different trials I've never even close to had in my life.

There are many life-changing decisions for me and for my family that are beginning to be made.

I have new and different views on a lot of things I'd never really thought about.

Really, this year is so far different than anything I've ever had before. And it truly all goes back to being because I got married. Marriage is so wonderful, and I absolutely LOVE it. But I will admit I never fully realized how much things really change, how different things suddenly become. Today, Dallas and I sat down and REALLY talked about our future children and what kind of lives we want them to live. We don't have any children. I'm not even pregnant. But for the first time in my life, I really worried and pondered on how I want my children to grow up - the kind of atmosphere I want them in, the people I want them around and relying on, the life I want them to have.
And I really, truly worried about it. I've worried about my own life, my own future plenty of times. I've worried so much that I don't even care as much what happens to me because I know I can get through and deal with anything. But I have never worried so much in my life - and it was about children I don't even have yet.

As I was saying before, new life, new year, new perspective. 

And because of it all, I've really decided I want, and need, to turn a new leaf. I want to turn my life around. I have a great life now, don't get me wrong, but there is a lot about me personally I want to change, a lot that I can make better about myself. With so much change in my life, this is the time to do it. The is the time to mold me into that better person. This is the time to make me the kind of person that can make a great life for my children so I don't have to worry like I did today. 

Truly, all my problems stem from me. My thoughts. My opinions. My feelings. Change me, and I change my problems. Because of this, I'm going to start with my personal spirituality - my personal relationship with my Father in Heaven - because in order to change me for the better, I need Him. I need my Savior. I can't do this alone, and we all know that. To become the person I want to be, I need to know the Person I want to be. 

That is my resolution this year. 

A better me.